As a teenager, I recall times when my friends and I would see an attractive “sister” and someone would ask, “Whose woman is that?” This is the same question Boaz asked when he saw Ruth collecting food in his fields (Ruth 2:5). This question may be viewed as sexist by some who see today’s woman as independent—of or, at least, equal to the man.
Today, to identify her as “his woman” could imply she is his “property.” A wife was regarded as the property of her husband until the 1960s. Within the last 50 years women’s rights have expanded in many ways. Today women work jobs, lead families, serve in the military, participate in professional sports, and initiate intimacy in ways unlike any other time in history.
It’s interesting that the church is represented in the Bible as “the bride of Christ” (Ephesians 5:21-33) being prepared for the “wedding feast.” I recently asked a group of seminary students, “If Jesus was a good friend of yours and he asked you if this woman (the Church) will be a good wife for him, would you say ‘yes’?” Many of the students quickly said “no!” They said no for the same reasons people don’t get married or end up divorced today.
If the man or woman your friend is considering marrying is known to be selfish, dishonest, unfaithful, not genuine, unskilled, irrational, inconsistent, confrontational or unhealthy, you would strongly discourage your friend from continuing that relationship.
The unfortunate truth is many people view the local church like this. The Black church of the past was seen as a safe haven, place of high morals, highly spiritual and concerned about the life of the people. The Black church was the most important institution in the social, cultural, educational, spiritual, political and economic life of everyone in the community.
But today, we must ask “whose woman is she?” In the Bible, we read how God made the woman from the man’s rib (or genetic material) and then presented her to be “a helper as his partner” (Genesis 2:18 NRSV).
If we apply this theme to the local church, many churches would not qualify as helpers working in partnership with God through Christ. Even in today’s modern society, a spouse wants a mate who is working in harmony with them to make their house a home and the family one rooted in love.
When we look at who Jesus is, we see someone who healed many, loved unconditionally, touched the untouchable, miraculously met needs and brought life to dead places. If the local church is truly the “bride of Christ,” she must work in partnership with him to meet the needs of the people closest to them.
The local church must commit itself to serve, give, work, live and love like Jesus did. If the church’s agenda is based on its own selfish interest, or the interest of the world, it is unfaithful. It represents the criticism by Jesus when he spoke of the “the wicked and adulterous generation” who always wants to receive and not give. It wants people to serve it, and not serve the people.
In these crucial times, the Black church must reclaim its place as the social, cultural, educational, spiritual, political and economic center of the community. Then everyone will know she is a good wife.
James Anyike is the senior pastor of Scott United Methodist Church in Indianapolis and an adjunct professor of church history for Wesley Seminary at Indiana Wesleyan University.
