Disclaimer: This column contains descriptions of domestic violence. Reader discretion is advised.
Land safely. It does not matter if you go back to the religion where you originally experienced the harm as an educated and healed person, decide to try another religion, or choose no religion at all. Please find emotional safety.
Think! Do you feel safe? Are you in a safe religious community? Do you have support?
Women and children (men) are being gaslit away from religion. In comparison, a person is being killed spiritually … slowly. That’s evil.
When a person is robbed of their spiritual foundation, just about every other domain of life can be drastically impacted: physical, emotional, mental, sexual, and financial. Religious trauma impacts the soul to the core and has the ability to cause anxiety, depression, nightmares, suicidal ideation, and worse.
Religious trauma can be defined as “the deep psychological and spiritual injuries that arise from overwhelming experiences, relationships, abuses, or systemic issues within a religious context, leading to lasting adverse effects on an individual’s mental, emotional, and social well-being,” according to religioustraumanetwork.com.
Sadly, I know the feeling of being harmed within religion. I sought support from 17 elders over the course of my Jehovah’s Witness marriage and could not get support. That is a systemic problem.
I will never forget what it was like the very first time that I got the courage to say something. I was shamed and told to be a more submissive wife when I disclosed that I was being strangled on multiple occasions. This means, according to the National Domestic Violence Hotline (hotline.org), that my risk of being killed by my then-husband was 10 times higher.
I understand now what I did not understand then. Many of the elders that I thought I could trust were either not trained to handle this type of shepherding or were simply abusers themselves. I did not experience the spiritual paradise that I was taught to believe in. That is wrong, and I deserved better. That is why I worship in the comfort of my own home, where I am secure.
Interestingly, I have noticed that Islam has an organization that supports abused women called RAHAMA, and one Christian resource is Safe Havens Interfaith Partnership Against Domestic Violence.
However, Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t yet have an advocacy group for survivors of domestic violence or religious abuse that I have found. This is one reason why I have decided to pursue advocacy through my upcoming documentary project, I am producing independently throuth Sisters Living with Religious Trauma® Support Media LLC. Learn more about this transformational project by visiting slrtsupport.com
Mira Cassidy is a Religious Abuse Recovery Coach, actress and writer. Contact her at mira@miracassidy.com or visit her new informational website, Sisters Living with Religious Trauma® Support Media LLC, at slrtsupport.com.
