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Thursday, May 30, 2024

Josiah’s Resolutions: "I am sick of letting my weight get the best of me…"

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Hello, readers it’s me again. I just started my new diet. I am just two weeks in and I am really impressed with myself. What new diet, you may ask. I have begun a partial liquid diet. I know all the standard objections. I’ve heard them all before. Liquid diets don’t work. You will only lose water weight. You’ll gain everything back. Trust me this isn’t my first rodeo. I have made my rounds. But what you need to realize is that I am sick of letting my weight get the best of me. I just turned twenty five. The twilight of my youth is all but behind me now. I don’t want to carry this burden into middle age. A majority of life I have been considered either overweight or morbidly obese (I have always and will always hate that term — morbidly obese; makes it sound like I’m suffering from stage four lung cancer, when it’s just some extra fat hanging from the side of my rib — it’s not incurable — it’s not the end of me). Now, I don’t want you thinking that my weight was like a shackle around my wrist. I have accomplished a lot in spite of my weight, but I am about to tell you something that most overweight people try hard to hide. Being fat sucks. I am not just talking from a personal stand point; I mean it sucks just for practical purposes too. Going into a store knowing they won’t have clothes that fit your particular size. Having to squeeze into chairs with side bars. Pulling at the hem of your shirt because it’s shrunk in the wash. Questioning whether or not that stool would buckle under the pressure. Being my size is like having a full time job, and frankly I am getting tired working overtime.

I am someone that has been on every diet from low carb, paleo, the lemonade detox, weight watchers and the list goes on and on, but this time it will be different. The reason being is because this time I’m not going cold turkey. It doesn’t work. I always give it the old college try, but end up failing each and every time. Then I came to the realization that my diet needs to fit me. There is no way I would be able to do a complete liquid diet. The idea of eating (or in this case drinking) the same thing day in and day out is not something I can see myself doing. The monotony would be too excruciating. My taste buds crave variety. My tongue is dangerously adventurous and my palate is insatiable. That’s why I needed a diet that’s limitations are catered to lifestyle. I AM A “MAN ABOUT FOOD” (my phrase, feel free to use it). So what I devised is a diet regime that allows me to eat one solid meal for lunch and two liquid replacement meals for breakfast and dinner. I originally thought I should have my breakfast be my solid meal of the day (it is the most important meal of day after all) but with a full time job, I wouldn’t have time to cook and prepare a breakfast that would reasonably qualm my hunger for an entire day. I also tend to exhaust the most energy during the middle of the day. In the mornings I’m drowsy and by the end of the day I am just waiting out the clock before I hit the sack, so reasonably replacing my breakfast and dinner with a liquid substitute was best fit for me (since those times of day require less energy) . I’ve already begun noticing the changes.

For the past couple of months my back has been killing me. I could never really understand why until recently. At first I thought it was my bed, but that theory didn’t hold any water. Then I figured I must have sprained something, but it’s not like I’m doing enough vigorous activity for that to be the case either. Finally I realized that my back was suffering from the same blight that well-endowed women have been suffering from for centuries. GRAVITY. The small of my back was caving inward, because my belly was getting bigger and drifting further and further down, and to compensate for the shift in balance I had to readjust. But now that I’m starting to shed some weight; I have noticed that my back is feeling lighter and my steps aren’t as heavy. I’m not going to say that I am as light as bird, but at least my stomach doesn’t have me sinking like a rock. Those little changes are really making all the difference and it lets me know that I am doing something right.

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