Domestic violence is bad.
Physically harming or verbally assaulting another individual is something that should never be taken lightly. Abuse at the hand of any individual is completely unacceptable and the proper repercussions should always be instituted.
On Monday, singer Chris Brown posted a video statement on his Web site apologizing for assaulting his then-girlfriend Rihanna. In the video, Brown said he wanted to apologize publicly since February, but remained silent upon the advice of his defense attorney.
Here’s an excerpt from Brown’s two-minute video:
“I have told Rihanna countless times, and I am telling you today, that I’m truly, truly sorry in that I wasn’t able to handle the situation both differently and better. What I did was unacceptable, 100 percent. I can only ask and pray that you forgive me. Please.”
Brown goes on to say, “I have tried to live my life in a way which can make those around me proud of me, and until recently, I think I was doing a pretty good job. I wish I had a chance to relive those few moments again, but unfortunately I can’t. I cannot go into what happened, and most importantly, I’m not going to sit here and make any excuses.”
Since releasing the video statement, people have had many different opinions; some felt the apology was appropriate, sincere, and heartfelt while others think Brown’s apology was actually unapologetic and too little, too late.
While I may be in the minority regarding Brown, I actually commend him for being accountable for his actions. Before you get too upset, just hear (or read) me out.
One very important thing to remember is that Brown is, in essence a kid. While being young is no excuse for assaulting someone, it does allow us to consider the mindset that he may have had at the time. Taking the time to think before we act is something that many adults haven’t been able to perfect, let alone a 20-year-old who, for the past several years has had access to anything (and probably everyone) he’s wanted.
Brown didn’t shy away from his involvement in February’s incident, instead he assumed all responsibility and plead guilty. I can think of other celebrities (R. Kelly, OJ Simpson) who may have been guilty of certain crimes, but never assumed responsibility.
The consequences to Brown’s actions resulted in five years of probation and 1,400 hours of “labor-oriented service.”
Another important thing to note is that as a child, Brown witnessed his mother being abused by his stepfather. Experts say that as with teenage pregnancies, domestic violence can be a vicious cycle. While Brown’s actions were completely wrong, one can understand his learned behavior. What should’ve happened, but probably didn’t is that once his mother was out of her abusive marriage, Brown should have seen a therapist at that time so that he could 1.) learn that abuse of any type is wrong, 2.) understand that his mother’s abuse wasn’t his fault and 3.) be educated on the importance of making smart choices and thinking before acting.
Brown’s actions support what research has told us for decades. This only further accentuates the significance of exposing our children to all the good and positive things in life, rather than the wrong and negative.
Some people are still angry with Brown, and that’s fine – I completely understand. But he has to move on with his life, as does Rihanna. At this point, I honestly don’t know what more people expect him to do. Is he supposed to abandon the gift of dance and music that he’s been blessed with and lock himself in a room for the rest of his life? Brown has admitted guilt, assumed responsibility for his bad choices and he will suffer the rest of his consequences once he’s sentenced on August 5.
Brown now needs to find a good therapist and continue to work on himself – not his career – but himself. Doing these things will better equip him in the future, both personally and professionally.
I applaud Brown for addressing this unfortunate instance blatantly. He has a very long way to go before he can move on and expect to receive the endorsements and fanfare that he once had, but he’s certainly headed in the right direction.
