From setback to comeback: Taking control of my leadership path

As a Black man in leadership, we do not get the second chances that others are afforded.

That is not a new thing, but something that we all know. So, with that, when you are in a leadership position, you have to understand that one mistake, one setback, can derail everything.

I learned that firsthand a few years back. I made a mistake — one that was entirely my fault. It wasn’t due to lack of skill or knowledge, but poor judgment and being undisciplined derailed everything I had worked for. I lost the position I had worked so hard for, and that mistake became the defining moment of my career. The sting of failure was deep, and I questioned if I’d ever recover.

Once I got past that sense of failure, I remembered that I come from a lineage of resilient people. I knew I would overcome this. Eventually, I found a new role; it felt like a second chance to rebuild and recapture all that was lost.

But as I settled in, I realized something even more troubling: I was still allowing the previous failure to dictate my future. I was hesitant to make decisions or take risks, and I was entrusting others to chart my course for me as if I was too afraid to trust my instincts again.

You cannot be afraid to tear it all down because God has already given you the strength to build it all back again. When you can take back everything, you must do it and trust what got you there the first time. Yes, I had made a mistake, but that didn’t mean I had to surrender control over my career. It was time to take ownership of my future successes.

If you continue to look back too long, you will lose sight of what is ahead of you. It is time to stop letting fear of another setback dictate my choices and start making decisions that reflect my true ambitions. I have learned that setbacks will shape us, but they don’t have to define us. My career is my story to tell, and I’m the one who gets to write the next chapter.

In today’s culture, it is easy to take the easy road; believe me, I was there.

The responsibilities of life and the uncertainty sometimes cause us not to take chances. Often, it is easy to fall into the trap of letting others steer the course of your career. Whether it’s pressure from managers, colleagues or industry trends, many people feel stuck or on a path that doesn’t align with their goals. Your career should be in your hands, and it’s essential to take intentional steps to own it.

I am not saying quit your job today and take chances. For those who read this and want to take back control, here are five actionable ways I am taking back control of my career, and you can, too.

1. Be clear with your career goals and build habits to reach them: I made it a point to be very clear on what success looks like for myself. I have to know exactly what I want to do in order to feel successful. When you are clear on that, then no one else can define it for you. It is about what you want rather than what others expect. The second part of that is to build good habits. Setting and being clear about your goals is good, but I learned that you must also develop good habits.
2. Invest in continuous learning: Seek opportunities to grow your skills and knowledge. I will admit the marathon and work that went into receiving my doctorate, but you cannot stop investing in your learning. The moment you stop investing in your learning is when you stop investing in your goals.
3. Build and nurture a strong network: You must have a front row. The front row will be the ones who will ride with you and ride for you. My network is one of the primary reasons my mistake was not the defining moment of my career. It was my network that got me the second opportunity. It will be my network that will get through taking back control over my career. You must surround yourself with people supporting your ambitions and offering valuable insights.
4. Praise and advocate for yourself: Many people will say let others speak about your good work. That is true and some good advice, but what else is good? You remind people of what you have accomplished, too. You cannot expect others to be as proud and excited about your accomplishments as you are. You have to be your best advocate.
5. Create boundaries and say no: A no to something is a yes to you. Say no to things that go against what you have planned for yourself. If you are in something that does not align with what you want, then create the boundary and say no. Sometimes you have to decline the role or direction someone has for you because it does not align with your career vision, protecting your time and focus.

Don’t regret your past. There is so much more in today and tomorrow than yesterday.