In this inaugural column and in celebration of Women’s History Month, it is only fitting that I dedicate it to my dear great-grandmother Vivian Irene White Marbury (or VIM). She was an Indianapolis activist, educator (as principal of IPS #87 for decades), and one of the founders of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority Inc. In the words of Shirley Chisolm, “If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring in a folding chair.” As a Black woman and educator, I know my VIM did just that! Through her legacy and this column, I hope to share wisdom, lessons and insights that reflect the life of love and service that she lived. I hope you will be enlightened, empowered and encouraged to serve and lead.
March is Women’s History Month! A month to celebrate all that women have been and done to enrich the lives of our society. There is usually a focus on well-known and deserving historical or contemporary change agents; however, the significant roles that everyday Black women have held in advancing change have often been sidelined or left in the shadows. One important group who deserves to be celebrated are Black women caregivers. In addition to the change agent that my VIM was in the community, she also held a huge role in my life beyond the title of great-grandmother. She was instrumental in raising me for periods of my life — a role that many Black grandmothers have held.
Serving as pillars in the community and often as the primary caregiver to their relatives and other children in the neighborhood, many Black children have thrived because of the wisdom, love and rearing of Black women who were not their biological mothers. This is called “othermothering,” a practice dating back to tribal and slavery eras where women would mother children not birthed by them for the purpose of racial uplift, collective survival and advocacy. This strategy persisted in the United States and was and is used to improve the educational, economic and social lives of Black Americans.
Othermothering comes in the form of people such as our grandmothers, aunts and community women who joined forces to make sure that the children were good. The Black woman teacher, store clerk, church mother, bus driver or lunch lady would quickly get you together if need be. The village of othermothers were there wherever you went to help guide and protect Black children. Unfortunately, challenges exist with othermothering today, as many do not rely on or even want the village to help raise and protect their children. Instead, there is a reliance on things such as technology and social media to do so. There are mothers who for whatever reason (perhaps pride or insecurities) do not want other people in their business and have rejected the wise input of elder Black women, but I believe it is time to reactivate the othermother village.
We need the Black women in our lives to stand in the gap for our children because we can’t do it alone. They need protection and guidance from the wisdom that exists in our community. The propensity of violence against Black bodies and the inequities that exist particularly for our Black children should call for us to rely on each other to do what we can to address and eliminate the barriers that exist. The survival, mental health, safety, education and future of Black children and families is at stake.
I offer a salute to the Black othermothers — the women like my great-grandmother who are the gems of the Black community. I know for me, without Vivian Irene White Marbury (RIP — whose birthday was March 11), I would not be the woman and mother that I am today. I will continue to do my part to uplift the Black children in my life and I challenge those who can serve as othermothers to step boldly out of the shadows to do the same. Happy Women’s History Month!
Dr. Khalilah A. Shabazz shares wisdom, lessons and insights on personal, social and societal issues of today. Contact her at shabazzk@iu.edu.
